Young Billy, he learned to be good with a gun
And traveled around helping everyone
The sheriff of Nothingham said "settle on down"
But Billy just smiled and said "no thanks"

The sheriff, he scorned him, he just couldn’t see
How Billy could be good while still being free
So he plotted to cut him down in mid stride
Billy was single - he had no bride

Billy got wind so he rode a bit south
And helped out a friend with no teeth in his mouth
He once had a mouthful but the devil knocked them out
He treats his playthings mean

Billy told old Gumby that he better change
Or God would take and fold up his range
Gumby didn’t like it so he sent Billy away
For saying what he’d seen

Billy went back north but he didn’t fit in
The sheriff of Nothingham tried to get him again
He knew that Billy had seen the truth
He never liked his kind anyway

Billy moved south to another place
And met a pretty woman there face to face
She said she’d marry him eventually
But she was hiding things

Alice in Wonderland was her name
Dancing around settling down - one of her games
Billy’s heart broke but that’s life, they say
Here in the big leagues

Indians chased Billy out of house and home
Alice went to places meant to stay unknown
A man was on bass but a double play
Stopped his chance to score

In a northern city Billy licked his wounds
A deputy asked Billy for some help at noon
The deputy thought Billy was an escapee
So he shot him down

In the ambush Billy’s horse was killed
Billy got a new one but still pays the bills
He no palomino Billy says
Of the deputy

Back to licking wounds, Billy got a call
Alice’s Wonderland wasn’t one at all
Seems her magic mushrooms left a funny taste
In her pretty mouth

Alice had a gun pointed at her head
Billy said "I want you with me instead"
Alice said "forget it, just leave me alone"
I deserve to die

Billy rode south to try and calm her down
He found her with a nose that was quite profound
It could suck the lines up off a football field
If you catch my drift

Alice had to do her lines again and again
And found herself in places looking up at strange men
Quite a price to pay for so-called living free
If that’s being alive

Billy had to stand there with his heart torn out
Eyes saw and ears heard but still this doubt
Finally old Billy said "to hell with this"
I can’t take it no more

Billy the Kid still plays the guitar
And shoots his guns under midwestern stars
You might still hear him in a local bar
Or on the radio

This is the story of Billy the Kid
The songs that he sang and the things that he did
It’s not what they’ll teach you in history
Maybe it’s really about me